Life Lessons: Starting over, new job, new people

We all have to experience a new day on the job in our life maybe a dozen or more times and no matter how long we have been working we still have those butter flies and are filled with nervous anticipation. As we grow and mature and become more professional we should be able to ease in and get adjusted to the new situation sooner and start to learn our responsibilities and role and move forward. With each new job we take we are always striving for challenges and to perform at our absolute best. Work is a necessity because it is our means for progressing in our career and matching our talents and abilities to an employer's needs and a means for making a living so we can provide for our family.

I am very eager to perform and do all that is expected of me and I always approach the work day with the same enthusiasm and commitment as I have since I started in the work force. There are those moments of awkwardness when you first start a new job but once you learn the job and what is expected then it is a matter of time in settling in and learning and progressing. It is very important to communicate effectively and at all times when it is necessary. You should never spin your wheels and never be afraid to ask questions. You just need to absorb things as quickly as you can so you don't ask the same questions.

I find that when I learn a new position or role in a new organization and take on responsibility I feel a sense of belonging and that is what I wish for. I wish to maintain professionalism, respect, a serious approach to my position, a dedicated work ethic and a personable way in dealing with co-worker's, management, the employer and clients. I am very appreciative of the opportunity given me and all the efforts of others in helping me to obtain this new position.

I have learned in life that we should always be optimistic and to always work with a dedication and firm commitment. I have been here for a week and have already found the people here to be wonderful and very kind. I can also see that the owners run their business with pride and respect and with a team approach. I also see that they encourage their employees to be dedicated through their hard work and also encourage a camaraderie among each other by planning outings together. I find this to be a great idea and I look forward to participating in these social functions because it makes a difference and encourages us to enjoy working with one another and also to enjoy social opportunities such as tennis, picnics, bowling or movies.

I look upon my life after college and all the opportunities I have enjoyed through the years and I find this is an opportunity I welcome and am very happy because it is in an environment that is engineering related and the position requires a considerable amount of planning and organization in the financial side. I will be working with accountants and engineers and am at home since my education was in both mechanical engineering and accounting and my favorite subjects in school were calculus, physics, intermediate accounting and cost accounting.

I look forward to a long term opportunity and will put forth my best effort and work with all parties in working towards management and ownership's goals. These are important things we learn in life that I will sit down with my son to talk about some day. He is young now but one day he will take on a job and I need to guide him and help him and try my best to provide insight to him so he will know what the working world is like.

Edward D. Iannielli III

Life Lessons: Taking pleasure in the simple things

Sometimes I just get so preoccupied with all the commitments I have and I try to fulfill all my obligations and all the promises I made. I am a man of my word and I will always strive to do my best and live a life of devotion, dedication and purpose. I know we all are seeking approval and a firm belief in ourselves and we are striving to please and satisfy others whether they are our employer, our clients, our family, our parents, our teacher's or our friends.

In life if we think about what our purpose is and what is important to us we realize that our children should always come first because we are responsible for their lives and want to provide them with our love, support and devotion. In our working lives we don't often get to see our children and for working mother's who have no choice but to get back to work this can be very frustrating. We all should delight in our children and especially young mother's who are raising young babies. I truly believe a young mother who has to work as soon as she can after giving birth loses out on so much. I believe what makes us human and compassionate are our children. I know when I had a week off when Maria and I had our precious baby Matthew I was so enjoying the moments spending time with them both. When I held my son early in the day rather than contending with the rush hour commute I just felt so happy. I wished I could spend more time with him but realized I just had this short window of opportunity so I made sure I made the most of it and I certainly did.

These are the simple pleasures in our lives that mean so much and I believe add years to our lives because they are so joyous and we become human again. In the working world it seems we have to keep our guard up and we become distant and cold. It may not be intentional but we lose that quality of sensitivity that only children can bring out in us.

I have thought about my son on many late nights in the office when I was working hard and felt guilty that I was not home spending time with him. I know how important it is to develop a relationship with our children and let them know that we are always here for them. I sometimes would get emotional about it and start to spend more time with him on my days off. I would know how important that time is with him and I would always love doing things with him and take such joy in the moment and would feel very happy knowing my son enjoyed our times out.

We will never be perfect no matter how hard we try but that is not what I am seeking. I know I am seeking more quality time with my son and giving him the time and attention he needs so he can start making progress. I know how important it is for all of us to help Matthew in his communication skills so he can talk with us or his cousins and friends and feel comfortable and loved. My time with Matthew is precious and I need to start finding ways to spend as much quality time with him as I can.

I took great joy in bowling with my son earlier today with my mother-in-law since Maria was working. We had a very enjoyable time together. I always am delighted when I have this time with my son and this is what I realize is so very important for both Matthew and myself. I was so proud of him and his improvement he made and am glad he enjoys it so much. The simplicity of bowling and the incredible joy that results because of the bonds forged for father and son is truly what makes life so worthwhile. It's not always about the active lives we live and the late nights we work to meet deadlines. It's the precious time we have with our children that makes our lives fulfilling. These are life's simple pleasures that truly make us realize what is most important.

Edward D. Iannielli III

Life Lessons: Facing the difficult realities of the times we live in

I have always placed an important emphasis on my work and have been committed to doing my best and maintaining a proper balance between my work responsibilities and my family responsibilities. Given the nature of the times we live in today we are always concerned for our financial responsibilities and I most certainly feel the pressures of meeting the demands of our mortgage and monthly costs. I am so frustrated when I hear the church officials ask us to give as often as we can and to be as generous as we can and to live debt free. I believe it is impossible to live debt free unless you are independently wealthy and for most of us that is not the case. If I did not incur debt I would never realize the dream of home ownership. I truly wish I could help the less fortunate and be as generous as I can but I have to keep my own finances in order so I can provide for my family and meet my monthly payments before I can be more generous.

The times we live in are very stressful and it seems we always have to push ourselves even when we are feeling sick and it seems we have no time to enjoy our lives anymore as we are so caught up in the pressures and demands of living with need for the basic necessities of modern day life. It seems we all need a house to live in which is a major undertaking and we need a car for both husband and wife. We also have to save for our children's' health and educational costs.

I realize as I get older the job market will not be as friendly and the opportunities will not be as plentiful and that is where we will have to rely on our survival skills and have to believe in our system. I will need to work the rest of my life and feel retirement will not be an option unless opportunities become less plentiful for professionals in their 50's and 60's. It seems to me we are forced into situations where we will have to rely strictly on ourselves and develop skills that will enable us to find self employment opportunities. When you are in your senior years that seems very difficult and very intimidating.

I know that my dad had longed for retirement when he was approaching his early 50's and felt happy about the prospect of retiring with his wife by his side. Unfortunately for my dad that was not to be as we lost our mom way to soon. This was very sad and I realized the pain, loneliness and isolation my dad felt when he no longer could work anymore because of his physical pain he endured from working as an ironworker for almost 40 years. Despite the pain and injuries he suffered and the tragedies he witnessed he truly had an amazing career as a Local 361 union ironworker.

When he did retire it was quite an adjustment for him. He worked hard his entire life and needed to have this time and he was fortunate to have a good pension and social security. He just had to occupy himself as he would become bored on occasion. He was fortunate that he had lots of grandchildren that were a big part of his life and kept him busy for so many years.

It seems that we try to do our very best in life and we are very responsible and for most of us we work very hard and with a high level of professionalism but it seems no matter how hard we work we still have to deal with the difficult times we are presently living in. The cruel reality for most of us who have saved throughout our working years is that our life's savings we accumulated through funding our pension has lost between 40-60 % of its value since 2001. I am so discouraged by these times and sometimes I wonder why so many people have to suffer and lose so much. To me it just seems so sad and that we have officials running this country that have no clue what we as people of this country are experiencing.

I hope that we can look forward to better times ahead and that all the suffering can be eased and all who can work and wish to work can get back to what they are meant to do and that is to work so they can provide for their families. We as a country have to be strong and we as people have to band together and seek to be strong and work hard to get back on track. We have to earn the respect we once had and we need to let Washington know that things have to change!

Edward D. Iannielli III

Life Lessons: Perseverance and staying the course

If I could teach a class with young aspiring students and I had to plan an introduction I would definitely put a lot of thought into it and I would relate my personal experiences. I feel we all have something to share with each other and we have a commitment to be responsible and to learn an effective way of communicating our knowledge, experiences and insight to help shape young minds. I feel teachers don't always get the respect and credit they deserve. I was fortunate to learn at an early age the importance of following direction, showing respect and staying attentive in the classroom. I was also very responsible with my homework assignments as I had a good support system with my Mom and my teachers. I learned a lot about life from my Mom and Dad and I was very impressionable and always knew that I had to take responsibility at a young age since I started my schooling.

The first thing I would discuss with young students is the importance of learning to like yourself. We all have to feel self acceptance and learn to appreciate who we are and feel comfortable with ourselves. The next thing I would teach young students is that they should always keep an open mind to learning and enjoy all facets of learning and they should always have a desire to explore and expand their minds and develop their talents and always learn to persevere. The key in life is to have self confidence and a desire to do your best. You don't have to be a genius to succeed and accomplish your goals and dreams. You just have to have a desire, a plan and a firm commitment and sense of never giving up.

I have discussed these ideals with my son and I try to make it an easy and manageable approach as my son has a limited span of attention and his mind processes things so fast. He is very aware of what I say and he realizes the importance of being responsible and following the teacher's instruction. I have a lot of patience with Matthew and try to put myself in his situation so I can try to understand what he must be experiencing. I am very easy going and want him to know that I am there for him and wish to help him every step of the way.

In my own life I have learned from experience that we all have to try our best at all times and to never give up. I remember when I was a mechanical engineering student in college how I at times felt overwhelmed with the course load and I remember trying to strive for my best at all times. I was fortunate that I had a desire to learn calculus and physics and that I found those subjects very stimulating and challenging and I was proud when I solved the problems. I was intrigued by applying formulas to mathematical and scientific situations. I also had the desire because my dad was an ironworker and worked on bridges and buildings and he had a talent for building Lindbergh's Spirit of St Louis air plane from cardboard, toothpicks and shoe boxes. He also built a tower crane and the steel frame of a building under construction and John F. Kennedy's PT 109 boat from the same materials and they all looked like they came from a model kit. He had an amazing talent and I was always so impressed as a young kid with his many projects. I also developed an interest in business and taxation and accounting and continued my schooling by pursuing an accounting degree. I was a very studious and committed student and I always strived to do my best.

I also learned to develop perseverance as a cross country runner in high school where I would run up to 75 - 80 miles a week for training. I remember enjoying those days and learning from our coach discipline and mental toughness. We had some exhausting training sessions and it helped build confidence and character. I remember my parents were proud when I completed races and placing well in the pack and they were extremely proud when I graduated from college.

Life is about learning and experiences and we all learn everyday and we must always stay focused and remain confident each and every day because we will always encounter new situations and be called upon to use our knowledge and skills and we will always be tested and our firm commitment to facing the challenges and proposing solutions is what makes us needed as professionals. We must always remember to persevere and to approach our assignments with purpose, dedication and confidence. My dad always did his best and he and mom both instilled this in me and I will instill this in my son.

I will always remember my parent's insight and the precious words of wisdom my parents shared with me.

"Bloom where you are planted." was something my dad always shared with me.

My mom always sat with me and helped me learn my mathematics problems and she would always say to "Never be afraid and always stay the course."

I have lived with these quotes all my life and they bring me back to happier times.

Edward D. Iannielli III

Life Lessons: Touched by others in our life

One of the most important things I have learned in life is our ability to touch another person by our words, our writings or for just being who we are. I have also learned that we should be grateful and appreciative of the actions of another person when they reach out to us in a special way. I have been very fortunate in my life to have a loving wife and a wonderful son and a very memorable and happy childhood with loving parents and 2 wonderful sisters. I feel I am very lucky and I always like to speak from my heart and relate stories that affect me and provide me the opportunity of sharing with others in a distant way and express myself in a safe way and speak how I feel. I have had many positive and happy experiences in my life along with some sad and painful experiences. One specific experience I wrote about in my blog was a day that started out as any other day for my parents when I was a baby as portrayed in the book "The Bridge" written by the famous author Gay Talese. The story I referred to in my writing was contained in a chapter of Talese's book titled "Death on the bridge". In the chapter Talese centers around 2 men. Their names are Edward D. Iannielli Jr, my father and Gerard McKee, a fellow ironworker. In the story he writes about both men and what their early experiences were like and how they became ironworkers.

On that fateful day my dad was briefly talking with Gerard before they went about their business on the bridge and as soon as they started their work day within minutes my dad heard Gerard's cries for help. As he turned in his direction he reached out and was doing all he could to grab a hold of Gerard but he had weight working against him as Gerard was a taller man and my dad had a damaged hand. My dad pleaded for God's help as he felt his grip of Gerard slipping and it was in that instant he could not hold on any longer and felt Gerard slip through his hands and watched him fall to the water below. He had no chance and if it wasn't for the quick actions of Lloyd LeClaire, a native American Indian who jumped on top of my dad and held him tight to the catwalk he would have went over as well. Lloyd was a hero and he saved my dad's life.

When I read about this in the book and spoke to my dad about it I always asked him about Lloyd LeClaire and if he kept in touch. I always felt deeply touched by his actions and wanted to shake his hand, hug him and tell him how thankful we were for his heroism in saving my dad's life. When I spoke about Lloyd I wanted to express my appreciation and felt this was my way of thanking him.

I always feel that we need to express things in our life and it helps us and makes us stronger. I felt the need to write about this sad day and felt for the McKee family and was very thankful to the LeClaire family. What I did not expect from writing about this was a wonderful series of writings from Lloyd's grandson who reached out to me about the story. I expressed to him when I wrote back how truly appreciative we were for having our dad for as long as we did and that was because of Lloyd LeClaire's quick actions that sad and tragic day. We were blessed and my dad had an angel looking over him and protecting him.

It is with heartfelt gratitude that I dedicate this story to the memories of all three men:

Gerard McKee
Edward D. Iannielli Jr and
Lloyd LeClaire

That was a day that changed the lives of all three men forever.

Edward D. Iannielli III

Life Lessons: Adapting to change

I have learned throughout life that we are always moving forward and changes are inevitable as we experience living, aging and maturing. We sometimes experience change in our personal life. We also experience change in our professional and working life. As part of evolving and maturing we will have to adapt to the many changes in our life and always maintain a healthy sense about it. Sometimes change may be hard to initially adjust to because it takes some getting used to and if change involves learning new things or getting used to a new set of procedures and meeting new people it is certainly understandable. Sometimes I feel it is hard to really get attached to people and situations because of the possibility of change. Sometimes you have to almost distance yourself from your feelings and always maintain the same level of professionalism and almost remain aloof to some degree. It is most important that you keep in mind that making changes are vital to growing and learning and we all should welcome change and always stay open minded about it.

Our son has made strides in his new school setting and he has adjusted well to his new teachers, new classmates and new school. It was a bit difficult for him initially because he missed his old school and his teacher and his former classmates. It is very common that autistic children tend to resist change and it takes some getting used to for them. They have a level of comfort with consistency so if change evolves they tend to react in ways that may not seem the norm. Our son now loves his new school and enjoys having several teachers and changes in classes. He is growing and maturing and we are very happy that he is making progress and that he is able to focus on his homework and act very mature and with respect. It is a relief for Maria and I knowing that our son is able to cope. This is what we want for our son which is that he develops confidence and that he is happy.

I have always tried my best to be polite, professional, agreeable, respectful and always maintain a nice way in conducting myself with others. I always try my best to treat everyone with the same level of respect and feel it is important to establish relationships built upon honesty, integrity and mutual respect. I also feel we have to always try to go that extra step and always work to the best of our ability and that we should always have hope and never get discouraged. It seems life is to short to let our fears and anxieties get the best of us. We need to be strong and have faith and believe in ourselves that we are worthwhile and do deserve opportunity. When we are given opportunity we should make the most of it and always be appreciative of the chance. We may make mistakes along the way but it is important that we learn from them and that we look at the bigger picture. We are all meant to work to make a living so we can provide for our families and we are also meant to provide to our employer the level of respect and dedication we learn as a professional and always put forth our best efforts. We are trained so we can take on responsibility and make choices and act prudently. Life is a series of challenges and we need to always face them and do our very best in taking them on and striving for success and pleasing others. We are dependent on others and they are dependent on us so we need to always keep this in mind.

The harder changes we will have to face are life event changes like experiencing the death of a loved one. These unfortunately are very painful changes and sometimes they come with no warning. We always have to be prepared but will always have our share of difficulties and emotional hurts. It is always important that we try to be honest with ourselves and try as best we can to get through that difficult time. It may take some time but we have to do our best to cope and get back to a normal routine. Life is too short to lose sight of this. The sooner we get back to a normal routine the better off we will be in the long run. It is understandable that we will always feel the loss and the pain. We do however have to be strong in our mindset and welcome getting back to a new normal routine. This does take time and we can not assume that we all will get over the loss at the same length of time. For some it may take awhile. We just have to remember that we will always have the pleasant memories and should always hold on to those special memories.

In talking to my son about loss and coping it is my belief that he has to understand that we will all one day die and for this very reason we should live everyday of our life to the fullest because there is no guarantee of another day. We plan to be here for another day but we just don't know. In talking to him about change I tell him that we all have changes in our life and changes are necessary because that is how we learn. He seems to understand this and is getting used to the idea though he still likes things to be the same as every autistic child wishes for.

Edward D. Iannielli III

Life Lessons: Looking at the bright side

The one major thing we try to teach our children in life is that they should always try to look at the bright side and never get discouraged or give up. It is essential that we maintain a healthy and positive outlook no matter the circumstances or burdens we face in life. We all wish to achieve great things and make a difference though the reality is we will usually get caught up in the day to day routines of life. This is the norm for most of us raising families. We all need to sometimes take a step back from our busy lives and try to experience life in a more simplistic way even if it is for a brief moment. We also need to free ourselves from our fears and worries so we can have more fulfilling lives and from there try to adapt a more spiritual and healthy view of life, family, work and responsibility. We are responsible for how we live our lives and although we make our choices we are also affected by factors beyond our control and we must learn to grow and get through the tough times we all encounter at some point in our lives.

I have learned in my own experiences that we are all very similar in ways and very different in ways also. The way we live life is based on so many factors and how we view things in our lives is based on our life experiences and the relationships we develop. As we grow it is essential that we maintain the youthful innocence that we were blessed with as young children. I see my son and his innocence and the precious way he relates to us and his peers and I am so delighted to see that child like quality that he should hold onto throughout his life. If we all stayed true to our inner child I believe the world we live in would be a better place. That is one very important view of mine and I believe that if we could try to reduce stress in our lives we could start to have more joy in our lives because we would not live in constant fear as that just makes life seem so much more difficult and takes years away from us.

If we could find ways to spend more time with our family and be very supportive and encourage our children we would feel so much better about our role as responsible parents. We as adults need to balance our lives and always stay committed to our work responsibilities and our family responsibilities. We learn that we can not get time back when it has passed us by and before we know it our children will be deciding on colleges so I know how important it is to spend more time with my son and teach him about life and to never be afraid. My parents helped to make the world right for me and I also need to help make the world right for my son. I need to make sure I can sit with my son on a weeknight and help him with his math assignment. That is very important as well as completing my work requirements. I take all things in my life very seriously and know in my heart that I am always trying my best and trying always to be respectful of others and to always do right by others. This is what I wish to teach my son so he too can live a life of promise and to always look on the bright side as that is what helps us in living and making choices.

In life we realize that we can not always experience happiness but if we can hold on to our memories and our relationships and we stay true to ourselves, our family, our work and our friends we will find a way to look at the brighter side and smile for that is what we all wish for for us and especially for our children.

Edward D. Iannielli III