Sometimes I wonder

I have thought about it many times and have always been mystified by it and then I take a step back and just keep going on wondering but not really knowing why. I guess it's just how things happen or are meant to be. We really don't fully grasp all the happenings and goings on in our life or the lives of others. To me it's like we are on a journey where we start off fully dependent on others, especially our parents and we are taught to be self reliant so we can go out into the world and start a life of our own as our parents and God intended. The average life span for mankind I believe is 75 years which by time measurement seems like a long time but as we live our life and time passes it seems like an instant in time. To me I can say I have been blessed having wonderful parents and sisters growing up. I was on the shy side but managed to have positive and joyful experiences as a child through to my early adulthood with my family.

In pondering how we came in to the world it is truly a miracle that our parents came to meet and by them meeting and starting a life together we were given this wonderful opportunity and gift of life. I feel the same way about meeting my wife and the miraculous birth of our son. It just is such a mystery how things come in to place so we can be born. If my dad never met my mom I would never be born and if I were not born then I would not have met my wife and our son would not be born and that is indeed the mystery and the wonder of life. It is destiny that 2 people come together in this great big world to unite and have a child born. I find it also a mystery how far back we go and trying to trace our ancestry lineage. It seems basic when you think about it but the reality is that tracing back is difficult because we need to rely on birth records. I have had the privilege of meeting my grand parents on both sides of my family and I also was fortunate enough to meet my great grandmother on my father's side. When you think about it we are here because they all met and continued each generation.

Sometimes when I think long and hard about it my mind just can not comprehend it. I am truly grateful for being given life and also elated and joyful for sharing in being blessed with the miracle of life with our son. I also feel sad that there are unborn and I wonder why. It makes you realize there is also the flip side where birth does not occur because of happenings. If you think about it many young people have died and never had an opportunity to meet someone and share in the miracle of life. It just seems like there are powers out there and fate has a hand in whether we come in to the world or not.

To explain life and our purpose to my son is something I take very seriously and I want him to know how truly blessed he is and that he has a true purpose in this life and he comes from a wonderful family who are so proud and happy to share in this miracle of life we experience together as a family. It sometimes seems silly that we get hung up on little inconsequential things that are passing moments when there is such a bigger picture that sometimes we are too busy to understand or see.

As I get older I become more philosophical in my views and thinking's and I also am very appreciative to have family, friends and a means to provide for my family. I must say that I have been fortunate in many ways and although I wonder and ponder the mysteries of life I can truly say I have a wonderful life. For becoming a father is the second best gift I can be given as the first is being born of my mom and dad.

The words I close with which I address to my mom, dad, sisters, wife, son, family, teachers and friends are as follows:

"It is in life I realize how truly lucky and fortunate I am for how my life has been shaped and influenced in such a wonderful way. I also have come to appreciate all that I have and all that I have been given. Therefore I say from the bottom of my heart and with tears in my eyes how grateful I am to have had such wonderful parents who gave me all the love, support and guidance I could ever ask for and wonderful sisters who taught me a thing or 2 about life. My most blessed gift is meeting my wife Maria and sharing in the joy and miracle of our son Matthew's birth. It is my wife and son who give me a reason and purpose and make me so very happy. I am not sure how much time I have left but knowing I have wonderful family and friends gives me the courage and strength to carry on and be grateful for what I have. As I see my son grow it just makes me want to always be there for him helping him and guiding him and showing him the way as I have learned. I want my son to find happiness and joy and to always feel loved, confident, and joyous. I want my son to have a wonderful life."

Edward D. Iannielli III