Sunday, January 24, 2010
The incredible gift of speaking from your heart.
I have been a very emotional person all throughout my life and always felt that we should always consider others feelings and to never discount them as we always wish to be considered and heard and respected and we should always respect others and treat them well. Occasionally we will have misunderstandings but I would never do anything to hurt or make one upset. I have always tried to be agreeable, polite and respectful in all my dealings with people. I believe life is complicated enough and we all should reach out and try to work together with others and do our best. I certainly wish I could do more in my life and certainly would love to but I feel limited at times in what I can do to make the world a better place because we have our own family responsibilities and financial commitments which can cause stress in our everyday lives. I was always taught by my parents that we need to help ourselves out first before we can help others. Charity always begins at home. Once we have made successful efforts in dealing with all our financial commitments and family needs then we should consider in some way reaching out and helping others.
Having an autistic son gives me a great deal of challenges as my love for my son is limitless. I would do anything for my son to help him and provide him the guidance, love and support he needs. He is super sensitive and easily gets upset and very frustrated and I need to help him overcome these difficulties so he can enjoy his life and feel like he belongs. It has always been my wish to help him develop his sense of self and to feel confident and happy. It is not always easy to teach confidence as we all have to learn through experiences and sometimes disappointments. Children all start out pretty much the same with a clean slate and as they grow they will develop certain skills at different ages and some kids will develop faster than others and will seemingly learn to interact and establish friendships. Once a child learns love of self and acceptance by others and they learn how to accept then they start to learn the lessons of life and friendships.
In learning about my son I have realized that he is very compassionate and wishes to always help someone whether it is his mommy in the kitchen making dinner or grandma washing clothes or daddy working on the computer or a little baby or a kid crying at the mall. He has a kind and caring heart and he wishes to do his part and wants to belong and feel like he is helping. Matty is almost a teenager and he seems very mature for his age and is considered very intelligent by all who meet him as we always recognized this in him as has his teachers. The one area that he needs intensive help and support is in socialization. He needs to feel comfortable and happy and like he belongs. When we go out to the movies where there is a play area he seems at home and loves to play with the kids and run around and establish a bond. He will seemingly have a fun time and all the kids he bonds with seem to enjoy his company and they all run after him and love to have Matty's attention.
I have always felt a connection to my son and my wife and feel very committed to helping him and I am also a sensitive and compassionate person and have dealt with shyness and certainly know what it can be like to feel alone at times. Therefore it is my desire, hope and goal to always be a big part of my son's life and give him my complete attention and love and the best support system I can to help him make strides in his life. I also need to let him learn on his own as part of growing up is learning for yourself because I can never guarantee that I can always be there but I will always try my best to be there. I have learned a lot about life and growing up and feeling both happy and sad. When we grow we have to deal with a lot of things in life and sometimes they can affect us and we have to sometimes learn to distance ourselves from our feelings and try to come to terms with the sad things in our lives. It is the struggles we encounter that make us stronger but also make us realize we are human and do have feelings.
As a parent of a special needs child I have come to learn how a child can touch your heart and soul and my son has certainly touched Maria's and my life and I am so very blessed by God to have Matty in our lives. I speak from my heart glowingly about my son because he has taught me so much about love and life and courage and true spirit and compassion. Matty has taught me more about life than I can ever imagine and by learning from both my parents and my son I can truly say they have made me a better person and have taught me what love truly is all about. I thank both my parents, my wife and my son for this and God for blessing me with Maria, Matty and wonderful parents and of course my mother-in-law.
Edward D. Iannielli III