I wanted to write you because I love you and miss you and wanted to share with you all the things that are happening in my life.
I am so sorry I never got to say goodbye to you at the hospital. I remember you when you were vibrant, strong and so beautiful and that is how I wish to remember you.
The years have gone by so quickly as we never expected to lose you so many years ago and at such a young age as you were only 50 and the year was 1990. I still think back to when I was a little boy and remember fondly how you helped me when I was struggling with school and how you and dad always encouraged me and made me feel good about myself. I miss you so much and every time I feel the urge to cry or feel sad I think back to you and how you comforted me and made things ok. I have the picture of you when you graduated highschool that I keep next to dad's ironworker picture and it helps me hold on to that special time in our lives when we were together as a family. Your picture shows your youth and your beauty when you were a young woman and free of all the family obligations. I enjoy cherishing that part of your life and also am very proud to be your son and you my mom. For I will always keep my love for you in my heart and never lose sight of that.
I have so many things to share with you that I'm not even sure where to begin. I guess you already know that I have a beautiful wife, Maria who I met when I was seeking counseling and was introduced to her by my psychologist and she helped pick me up and made me realize that I did not have to live alone. She gave me hope and made me feel happy being able to open up and share things with her. We dated a while and we both felt happy together. I met many girls throughout the years who I liked but my shyness seemed to get in the way and that limited my experiences. As I get older my shyness has been more controlled.
Maria and I married on September 12, 1998 after dating for a year and we have a son, Matthew. He was born on December 8th, 1998 but he will tell you that his birthday is March 8th, 1999. I believe his reason is because he hates the winter and also because he does not like being the oldest in his class.
The ironic thing about that is December 8th is really the fall and March 8th is the winter so his reason is slightly incorrect but he is a brilliant child.
Matthew is wonderful and you would fall in love with him at first sight. He is our precious little boy and he is such a joy. He is very special to us as he has some challenges. You see, Matthew is autistic and he has difficulties establishing relationships and making friends. We work together in trying to help him and encourage him like you and dad did for Kathy, Joannie and myself. We enroll him in a wonderful camp program, Camp Kehilla which is a summer program affiliated with the Sid Jacobson JCC that he really enjoys and he does have wonderful counselors who are trained to work with special needs children. He's met some really nice kids and he enjoys the activities. He even went on a field trip to Citifield to see a Met's game and they won too! I forgot to tell you that the Met's now play in a new stadium as they tore down Shea last year. You were lucky enough to see their last world series win which was 1986. The closest they got since then was in 2000 but they lost in 5 to the New York Yankees. I am still a Mets fan despite a very dismal season. Maria is a Yankee fan and Matthew likes both teams.
I have been working all these years as a CPA as I got my license in 1990. I was proud of my achievement and I owe it to both you and dad for helping me with college and with my review course.
Dad helped Maria and I in buying a cute little house in Levittown which you would like and Maria's mom stays with us to help watch Matthew. We have a nice little backyard where Matthew likes to run around and I sometimes enjoy a catch with him.
I think back to the music you used to play to me when I was little and remember fondly those special moments. Puff the Magic Dragon and Blowin in the wind were some of my favorites. It seems like only yesterday.
I enjoyed a special night attending my 30 year highschool reunion and met so many friends and special people there. It was a magical night and I felt like a kid again. One of the girl's there who was in my class made the trip from Tennessee with her husband and she and I became friends on the computer. After dad died I was very sad and depressed and Janet Rose Schenkel wrote me encouraging words to help cheer me up at a difficult time and she gave me a big hug at the reunion and made me feel comforted like you used to do! I was happy to see her after so many years had gone by. I told Maria about it and she says I have a special friendship and we can never have enough friends.
Matthew is now 10 years old and he loves to sing and write in his journal and dad loved to come and visit him. Dad was so nice to Matthew and we miss him so much. We know you and dad are now reunited and that helps me in dealing with his loss and I'm sure he's also talking with his brother Donald too.
We all get together, Kathy, Joannie and myself and our families. Devin, Kathy's oldest son who you saw as a 2 year old is now 20 years old and we have 8 kids all together. Kathy's kids are Devin, Gregory, who is in the Marines and Amanda.
Joannie's kids are Michael, Catherine (named after you), Rosalie and Angelina.
Our son Matthew, our pride and joy is our only child and I hope we can have one more as I would love to have a baby girl too. Matthew would love to have a baby sister.
They are all beautiful kids and you would be so proud!
Well I love you and Dad very much and am glad I was able to write you.
Take good care and protect dad as he truly loves you!
Your loving son,