Saturday, September 26, 2009

Living in the moment.

Sometimes I feel it is best to live in the moment rather than thinking about every little thing in your life which brings on worry and affects you in all aspects of your life. When I live in the moment I feel content and am very happy with the experiences that are pleasant. I can remember back to times when I was living in the moment and everything around me seemed to be a blur but in that experience I was living through I can remember everything as if it recently happened. I believe when you live for the day and find joy you are contributing to finding peace, joy and happiness in your life. Instead of being consumed with worry you are enjoying life and living each day as it happens. Obviously there is planning in life and schedules to adhere to but changing how you think and approach things seems to make a difference. Also when you live in the moment you are confronted with sad times also and have to learn to approach each day in a way that helps you cope and learn to handle the sad times we all experience.

One such day that clearly sticks out in my mind where I was living in the moment was my wedding day when time seemed to stand still for that brief moment in time and my wife and I enjoyed the whole day and I admired my wife in her beautiful wedding gown and thought I was in heaven marrying someone very special and beautiful. I felt very blessed and happy that day sharing it with family and friends. The joy I felt that day never goes away and I can think back to that very special day and remember being very happy and being very appreciative to my dad who was responsible for giving us this special day and my psychologist, Michele who brought Maria and I together.

Another day I clearly remember frozen in time was the day when my wife announced to me that she was pregnant and I was so delighted and all my dreams had come true that day as I always wanted to experience the birth of a child and from that day on was the beginning of such joy and happiness as I eagerly awaited the birth of our son.

When Maria gave birth it was the beginning of a new chapter in our life and I was so thrilled. I remember Matthew's birth so clearly and so vividly and I remember all the nurses and doctors there as the happiest moment in our life came true and we welcomed Matthew. I love thinking back to that very special day as that was and will always be the very happiest day of our lives. I remember seeing Maria cradling Matthew for the first time and the nurse giving Matthew his first cleaning and seeing the joy on my wife's face and the pride my dad had in having another grandchild and seeing Matthew for the first time.

In living in the moment we also remember days of sadness and times that are difficult as I remember learning when Matthew had his first seizure and it was a very unsettling feeling and one that caused me a great deal of anxiety and worry which affected me in a way that brought the reality of the situation to me in the fore front. I knew we had to seek medical assistance for our son as we were dealing with something very serious and had to find the proper way to help him. We learned that Matthew had been diagnosed with epilepsy and had to take medication daily to help control it. We managed to get through the difficulties and felt better about Matthew's situation once he started seeing a medical professional and starting on medication that will help him.

When we learned that Matthew was also diagnosed as autistic it was a very difficult reality to get accustomed to and I remember having helpless feelings and a lot of uncertainty. We needed to rely on people who could help our son and us with all the questions going through our minds and help us in dealing with our feelings of helplessness. Once we started making steps in the right direction and getting Matthew into early intervention we felt better about his situation and we were delighted with all the speech and language therapists and teachers that came into his life from the beginning. As he made progress we felt better for him and wanted to make sure he continued to do so.

When Matthew attended school for the first time and the bus came to pick him up it was a first for him and for us and it was another pleasant memory that has always stayed with us and reminds us of how quickly he is growing.

As we grow as a family I enjoy all the happy memories and the challenges and look upon our experiences as necessary in growing and meeting the demands of life.

There are moments in time that are very sad to that make me think back and bring tears of sadness to my eyes. One such moment was when I learned of my mother's death. When I learned of my father's death which was recent I had felt a major part of my life had gone as I felt with my mother as well. Now that they are both gone I hold on to all the special memories that helped shape me and made me a better person.

There are moments of great sadness to that have caused me great pain even though I was not directly connected to them but felt I had to reach out and the one's that come to mind in the order I remember them were as follows:

The assassination of John F. Kennedy
The assassination of Robert F. Kennedy
The assassination of Martin Luther King
The Apollo launching tragedy
The assassination of John Lennon
The Challenger tragedy
The Oklahoma City tragedy
The World Trade Center tragedy
The Columbine HS massacre
The September 11th tragedy
The Virginia Tech massacre

These are events that froze time in a terrible way and brought great sadness to many. We have to try to get through these sad times and strive to do the best we can and live lives that inspire and help others. We are here for a short while and we are judged for all the good we do and our mission should be taken seriously and if we are fortunate to be blessed with children it is our responsibility to nourish them, protect them, guide them and teach them so they can live meaningful and happy lives.

So I will choose to live life in the moment and do the very best I can for my family and live a life that is both meaningful and helpful to others. I am blessed and am fortunate to have been given life and for being blessed with sharing life with all that are very special to me.

Edward D. Iannielli III

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Please feel free to read my writings and leave a kind message or suggestion. Thank you. Emily