Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Maintaining sense of calmness.

I feel I need to try to be distant at times from all who know me and at times very close and personal. I believe it is very important to be a bit of both and it is also very important to know when you need to distance yourself from what is happening in your life and take a step back and just try to deal with things around you in a way that will get you through and keep you safe and protected. I have been very good at keeping my feelings in check and living my life in a way my parents would be proud. I am very kind and respectful of others and I never have a criticism of anybody as by my nature I tend to be a very agreeable and easy going person similar to my dad. I am also very compassionate and caring and probably on the sensitive side like my mom. I benefited from both my parents. I have learned through day to day life that we have our good days and we have our days of great joy and happiness and we have our days of great sadness and anguish. It is the reality of life and we are not immune from it. I know as a parent I have days where I have great difficulty in letting go and seeing my son grow up as I wish we could hold on to his youth and innocence but the reality is our son will grow into adulthood one day and hopefully will be equipped to face the world as we have learned to. I want my son to have a life where he can do as he wishes and get an education that will enable him to strive and achieve great things. It is only natural for us to want better for our kids as that was our parents hopes and dreams for my 2 sisters and I.

I have learned over the years that it is better to face things in life with a sense of understanding, awareness, and an even keel disposition. Maintaining calmness gives you clarity in how you approach dealing with a situation and it helps you get through difficult times in a way that makes you stronger and better as a person. I wouldn't say I am becoming hardened as a person by approaching life this way but am maintaining realism and being honest with myself. I also feel that I have experienced enough in life that I am really not surprised at anything anymore and I am very tolerant and never judgemental of others. I am very understanding and supportive and would only be encouraging as this is how I was taught. We need to appreciate what makes people different or unique and try to understand them.

My son is a very cute and wonderful child who has such wonderful qualities and he sometimes is prejudged and labeled and I don't want him to go through life this way. I understand the need to identify the reason a child is treated differently and why a label of the condition is important but I don't want my son to feel like he is different from other children and therefore will always have to live by a label. I want him to go forward and live his life and take on challenges and set goals and strive for success. It would be a disservice to him if we discouraged him from following his heart and doing what he dreams. We want our son to feel like a part of the crowd in a sense so he doesn't have to feel different but also want him to know that he does have special qualities that make him special and will allow him to do whatever he wishes in his life. We will always let him know this and to never have him think less of himself. I will also try to teach him to deal with life's changes in a way where he will be strong and equipped to deal with the sad times and the disappointments as that is so very important.

I have been dealing with several things that have made me feel a bit depressed and I was honest enough with myself to realize I needed to talk with a professional and seek medication to ease my sad feelings. It is very important to recognize when a situation seems too overwhelming and you need to seek help. There is nothing wrong with these kind of feelings as it only proves that we are human and do have times when we need to take care of ourselves so we can be strong and get through the pain and be stronger for our loved ones. It is a sign of maturity and a sense of realizing you need to take care of yourself. Sometimes a hug from a friend will help make the difference or a compliment on doing a good job. I have learned in life that words of encouragement and praise for doing good and maintaining a sense of calmness and composure is far better than harsh words of criticism and insult and screaming and yelling which are destructive and cause more harm than good. I will always give my son a boost and kind words to help him. I would never want to hurt or make him feel bad. This only make things worse and for my son it is very important to help build him up and give him confidence and provide him with nurturing and understanding.

I feel in life that if we are calm and composed it helps us deal with all of life's challenges and makes us more equipped to better deal with things as they come up. Life is so unpredictable and we always have to be prepared and by staying calm and focused is probably the best way to be. I have tried to live this way since I was a young man in my 20's and still try to live this way as a husband and a father and a son and a brother and a working man and whatever else I am portrayed as.

The best thing in life is knowing that we are all here for a reason and we have a purpose and by living a life of humbleness and working to do your best with your God given ability and maintaining inner peace and calmness and taking care of your family and reaching out to help your family, friends and all who are part of your life is all we can ask for. This is what I will help teach my son so he can feel a sense of peace and joy and know he should always strive to do his best.

This is what my parents did, This is what I do and this is what I will teach my son to do.

Edward D. Iannielli III

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Please feel free to read my writings and leave a kind message or suggestion. Thank you. Emily